The day from hell

I couldn’t wait for the blood test results…. I did another pregnancy test this morning. I couldn’t look. I’ll I’ve been doing the last couple days is crying. I can’t be alone. I’m so afraid that I’ve miscarried. I’m sure I have. But I’m hoping I haven’t. I love this little bean so much.

Husband looked at the test for me… It was negative. I never thought it would hurt so much,so soon. I feel stupid for being so upset. I cried so hard, uncontrollably.

I’ve known I’ve been pregnant for a week. And now I’m not. No sickness any more, no sore boobs. It’s all gone. I feel so lost, so empty. All I want to do is cry. I need to get out this house. I need to do something to distract myself. It’s all I can think of. My bean has gone. 😭

I got the call from the doctors. They confirmed it. My hcg levels say I’m not pregnant. Once again I feel like I’ve been torn in two.

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